Articles

When Your Expectations Make You Unhappy, Do This

Should is a dangerous word.  Whenever I catch myself saying life should be a certain way, I pause and quickly challenge that thought. I know it’s an unhealthy place to be. When we stew in what life should be like, we dodge responsibility for changing what life is currently like.  “Should” language often arises from […]

How to Give Up the Fear of Failure

Someone recently asked me: “What’s different in you?” They were acknowledging my success at work, my passion for life, and my overall joy. They had noticed a shift in me, but couldn’t tell what made the difference. I, however, knew exactly what it was. “I don’t fear failure as much as I used to,” I […]

6 Ways to Help Someone Contemplating Suicide

I’ve felt the sting of suicide loss before. I’ve gone through the thoughts that tried to make sense of it. I’ve asked the question, “was there anything I could’ve done to help?”  Unfortunately, these questions and thoughts have been replaying in my mind more often now.  In 2017, suicide was the 10th leading cause of […]

What to Do with Competing Life Philosophies

“That’s not what I want for us,” I told my wife as we walked along the shores of a quiet beach. Every now and then I pause long enough to see what sort of future I’m creating for our family. When we were walking along that beach, enjoying the stillness of vacation, I realized I […]

The Real Reason You Struggle to Change Your Negative Beliefs

All problems begin in our heads. It’s true. Problems are not problems until we think they are problems.  Many people look at the world and see external obstacles blocking them from their dreams. But many times, it is our negative beliefs dictating what is an obstacle or not. This is why it’s important to snuff […]

3 Tiny Actions Feeding Your Negativity Without You Realizing It

In an increasingly cynical society, much of the negativity we let into our lives is unconscious.  Negativity seeps past our awareness filters and then colors our attitude, emotions, thoughts, and actions. If we don’t want to fuel our life with negativity, we have to increase our awareness of the things adding negativity in our life. […]

Are You Outsourcing Your Belief?

I spent years of my life needing everybody’s approval before I could go out and do my work in the world. I thought this was natural, that everybody needed this for success. But it turns out, craving everybody’s approval is the fastest way to burnout. When you need people’s approval to do ambitious work, you’re […]

Beware of This Common Fallacy if You Want to Be Happy Today

When I was new in my business years ago, I would tell my wife, “Once we make it, things will be different.” Now that my business is behind me, I regret comforting her, and myself, with those words. Negativity fueled my success in business. Every win was just a band-aid for the shame I felt […]

The Surprising Consequences of Daily Blaming

Taking responsibility for a fault or wrong has become a healthy habit of mine. I don’t take responsibility for actions that aren’t mine to own, but for the faults that I’ve played part in, I naturally acknowledge what I did wrong in the situation. But this habit of responsibility and ownership was an intentional effort […]

Negative Defaults: How to Solve Your Pull Toward Unhappiness

Chronic unhappiness is a large, sweeping problem of our generation. In the recently released World Happiness Report, the United States was shown to have decreased in its happiness for the third straight year in a row. People in the US are the unhappiest they’ve ever been, even though crime rates are lower and the economy […]